Did I mention I have no idea what I’m doing?

(PROPRIETOR’S WARNING: This post may/may not be GIFtastic…)

I’m a published author.

Holy shit. I’m a published author… bitches.

It’s so surreal.

Wanna know what’s MORE surreal? Screening your first round of audition files for your very first title.

The realization of the full magnitude of this endeavor was somewhat delayed by my jumping through hoops to trade-in/refinance a car at the last possible second last Monday… immediately followed by starting up a NerdHQ, et al-focused volunteer transcription service** in the middle of the night with zero preamble. Because obviously.

** Please note that this volunteer transcription service is in no way affiliated with The Nerd Machine, NerdHQ, Comic Con International, Zac Levi, Stephen Amell, or any of the other nerd stuff we may transcribe. We’re just doing it because a deaf fan poked Mr. Amell on his community page and I saw it while I was trying to avoid rewriting a chapter of my book. Win/win, really…**

Then I got so exhausted I forgot this post was still in draft mode for a week and I hadn’t actually finished it yet. Oops.

So let’s catch up.

My book is for sale via Amazon Kindle and is also available in paperback via the same link. It’s a collection of over 350 RFLs (Random First Lines, though — after 300 or so — the F rapidly grew to stand for something else…) designed to get someone thinking about what happens next. Each line is supposed to slam a picture into your brain, where you’re excited or curious enough that you just HAVE to build on it… even if it’s just the next sentence.

The transcription service has since been named NerdWords, there are three other admins, 9 transcriptionists, and a Twitter account… which is really great because I started this and five minutes later thought:

…But there are many, we’re gaining traction, and we’re setting up a Patreon full of goodies soon, so stay tuned!

Meanwhile…

I’ve also started recording things to glom together in a demo reel to start voiceover work while I’m waiting for my book-writing career to skyrocket.

Gaga Eye Roll

So, in short, I’m very, very freaking busy. But it’s all good!

I think I’ve also found my fellow narrator, but it’s far too soon to announce that officially so… nope. Just wait, you.

Finally, I discovered two Amazon services I’ll be trying out over the next few weeks: Write On and Kindle Scout.  The first is basically a ginormous writing and critique group, while the second is Amazon’s new in-house publishing schtick, where you submit your finished novels and pimp the hell out of them… and if your works get enough votes you get a publishing contract! There’s more to it, but they’re not paying me to pimp them, so I’m not going to go through the effort. (But you should really click on the links.)

I’ll think of more interesting things to say once I’m done driving Uber for the day… OH! That’s what I forgot to write down: the awesome Uber stories I had from the 4th of July. Crap, I forgot them.

Guess I’ll have to drive around some more…

In the meantime, I leave you with a random first line (RFL) from my book that’s out:

My sister is banned from every Taco Bell for a twenty-mile radius around our hometown.

Post your creative responses in the comments section (or link to where you publish your results!).

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